Warura's Musings

First off...I have to write this fast enough before I start having contradicting views in my head and end up not doing it....it happens. I am scrolling through Instagram and I come across a post by the beautiful Taraji P. Henson. It is a short clip titled 'Afro Art' and it showcases different beautiful girls adorning their equally beautiful Afros (too many 'beautiful' in one paragraph...but then....beautiful). The clip is aimed at inspiring girls to embrace their naturals hair. It's quite a peace of work, skillfully done and the shots are amazing. When I watched the clip, I was sad. Sad because we are still living in this world where human beings have refused to accept the fact that we are all different. We were created differently. No human being is similar to the other. Our differences have been used time and again to discriminate, intimidate and pass our own selfish agendas. Our looks and genetic makeup should be a non-issue in this time and error. So you h...

I think I have written it before....if not i will write it sometime in the future. I had a hard time growing up, i can't claim I had a normal childhood. I was exposed to too much pain, too fast. I was scarred. This has been part of my adulthood, my childhood. I think of myself as a very strong and resilient woman, and I have no doubt about that....but those scars, those scars bleed. Maybe more often that they should. Sometimes I feel like I can actually feel the blood trickling from them. They are still raw. On my best days, I can't feel them, I am care free and very happy. But on the bad days, they hurt, over and over again. My soul feels like it has been stabbed in so many places and locked in a very dark place. I hate such days. All this has left me very sensitive, emotionally. There seems too be a well of tears in my eyes that never dry up. The simplest of things makes me break down involuntarily. It can be a hug, a family reunion, a happy couple, sad scenes, a crying bab...

In 2008, I lost my father. It was devastating. At one point I felt so low, so alone, i thought I would not get through it. I can't believe it has been that long since I last saw him. I miss him terribly. This worsens when I feel like I need some fatherly advise or love. I have my mom, whom I love to death. She is my best friend and I would do absolutely anything for her; but my mom is soft....she is sensitive. She has had her fair share of a tough life. Sometimes I feel i need to spare her my agonies and just deal with them.....this is where my dad would come in. He was tough and rough. He is the kind of person who was literally feared. No one dared cross his path because they knew who they would deal with.....and he never let anything slide, nothing. He was loyal, the kind that would die defending his beliefs. I remember he used to get arrested during the campaign seasons for being outspoken about his political views. He never minced his words.....he was that guy. I miss that asp...

I wear my heart on my sleeve, i have always done that. I have been cautioned by my family and friends....but it is not a choice i make, it just happens naturally. I find myself giving 100%; i love passionately and deeply. This makes break ups very hard. I have had several already, but i never learn..... 'been there done that, been there once more; because apparently, i never learn'. Well, i will do it all over again....until the day I will find my 'the one'. I always enter into a relationship with the goal being, he just might be the one. So i enjoy it while it lasts, the ups and the downs, the friendship.....i always enjoy the journey. Getting to know someone is an interest for me and i actually enjoy it. I am single at the moment, so none of my relationships have been successful. They have been so insightful however and i have never regretted any one of them. The shortest has lasted a little over one year while the longest has lasted, well, years. A time comes whe...

She is 90+ years. No one knows for sure. She has an idea when she was born, but not a certain year. When i think of 90 years......that's a long time! It is triple my years plus more.....that's a really long time. My siblings and I are closer to my grandmother more than most of my cousins, this is because she brought us up during our earlier years (between 3-10). She removed my first tooth - and it was a long tale. She had to chase me up a tree, because i was so scared and hard headed :). She would make sure we had enough breakfast before school and that our uniforms were clean. She fed us, took us to the farm, showed us how to cook, carry out chores and most importantly, she took us to church. I was a member of the Sunday school. I still remember my teachers, one even got married to my uncle, she was teacher Peninah. There was also Shem, a man, strict but very effective in his teachings. We were involved in dramas and this were particularly intense during Easter and Christm...

And the last time i posted was 2013! What a shame!......but maybe not :) I liked writing down my life's events, i used to have a diary, i often come across a page i randomly wrote and it brings joy in my heart when i reminisce those times. Sometimes i wish i could write everyday day....oh the joy of going back and reading every single pages of days gone by, of memories long forgotten and joys that lasted just but a minute.....i think that will be my greatest regret in life, not recording my days. It is nearly the end of 2015.....2014 went by like a flash and this year....I can't even begin to understand what happened in all those days....it's gone by way toooo fast. One thing for sure, I have grown in leaps and bounds. I am not the woman i was last year, and i am not the woman i was in January. Events have changed me, changes have changed me. I am different and I am happy. Some if the changes are not so exciting but I know they will serve me well. Lat year I lost an a...

Last week, a day like today, i was an ugly mess; emotionally, psychologically, physically and socially.....I was all that, at the same time! Needless to say, I was totally unapproachable, and my mood swings were worse than that of a teenager at their peek. I was experiencing strong emotions that i never thought i could exude at any given time. Explanation: I broke up with my boyfriend. I like to think myself as the composed, independent, emotionally stable, logical and strong woman. I like to think that I am in control of my own life and that no one, whatsoever can shake the foundations of my existence. I console myself every other day that I can do it, I will make it in life without the intervention of anyone. Well, that has not changed and it will not change any time soon. The fact is that I never ever thought one single person could have such a profound effect on my life! Let's go back to my mess.....i said emotional, psychological, physical and social. Emotional and psycholo...