I MISS YOU DAD :(
In 2008, I lost my father. It was devastating. At one point I felt so low, so alone, i thought I would not get through it. I can't believe it has been that long since I last saw him. I miss him terribly. This worsens when I feel like I need some fatherly advise or love. I have my mom, whom I love to death. She is my best friend and I would do absolutely anything for her; but my mom is soft....she is sensitive. She has had her fair share of a tough life. Sometimes I feel i need to spare her my agonies and just deal with them.....this is where my dad would come in.
He was tough and rough. He is the kind of person who was literally feared. No one dared cross his path because they knew who they would deal with.....and he never let anything slide, nothing. He was loyal, the kind that would die defending his beliefs. I remember he used to get arrested during the campaign seasons for being outspoken about his political views. He never minced his words.....he was that guy. I miss that aspect of toughness in my life. I miss telling someone 'oh i am going through this' and having a 'toughen up young lady or life is a bitch or i thought you are tough' kind of response.
If I go crying to mom or break down, chances are she will break down with me. I hate to see her crying.....she has cried enough.
So, I miss my dad. I miss him a lot. I want to have a margarita as he sips his Tusker (yes dad, i do margaritas and mojitos once in a while ;) ) When he passed on I was not allowed to take alcohol, but I used to lick his beer glasses back in the day.....and i never understood why someone would take what tasted to me like fermented barley.....it still tastes that way, right??
So in my mind I have this endless conversations. I want him to tell me how he used to chase girls :) and more especially, dad, why can't I seem to find the right man? These are the conversations that I will never get to have with my father.
I miss him dearly. I know I will always miss him, in every part of my journey because no matter how old we are, we always need a loving tender hand, and another tough one.....for life is a bed of roses.
Rest in peace daddy.....
He was tough and rough. He is the kind of person who was literally feared. No one dared cross his path because they knew who they would deal with.....and he never let anything slide, nothing. He was loyal, the kind that would die defending his beliefs. I remember he used to get arrested during the campaign seasons for being outspoken about his political views. He never minced his words.....he was that guy. I miss that aspect of toughness in my life. I miss telling someone 'oh i am going through this' and having a 'toughen up young lady or life is a bitch or i thought you are tough' kind of response.
If I go crying to mom or break down, chances are she will break down with me. I hate to see her crying.....she has cried enough.
So, I miss my dad. I miss him a lot. I want to have a margarita as he sips his Tusker (yes dad, i do margaritas and mojitos once in a while ;) ) When he passed on I was not allowed to take alcohol, but I used to lick his beer glasses back in the day.....and i never understood why someone would take what tasted to me like fermented barley.....it still tastes that way, right??
So in my mind I have this endless conversations. I want him to tell me how he used to chase girls :) and more especially, dad, why can't I seem to find the right man? These are the conversations that I will never get to have with my father.
I miss him dearly. I know I will always miss him, in every part of my journey because no matter how old we are, we always need a loving tender hand, and another tough one.....for life is a bed of roses.
Rest in peace daddy.....
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